MEN OUT OF TECH

Sorry men, this is going to get a bit techie. You might want to go look at cars or something.

Why should we get men out of tech?

Ever since we started letting men into the sector in the late 70s-early 80s, many things have become evident. We need to sort it out!

1. Men's brains are functionally incapable of writing good code.

As we all know, men are genetically predicated to think about only a few things - sex, cars, sports. You know the sort. How can a man write good code when his head is full of frivolous boyish frippery? You need a good, analytical mind to write good code, not testosterone-fueled sex drive and the subconscious desire to be covered in oil while kicking a ball around all the time. It just doesn't add up!


A man in his natural habitat. Would you really force him to sit behind a keyboard?

2. A man's place is in a manual labour job.

The physical differences between men and women are clear. Men evolved to hunt, their muscle mass makes them excellent for doing manual tasks. Would you really put a person with 36% more muscle mass on average behind a desk? No! They're wasted in tech! A man's place is driving the forklift, not behind the keyboard.

3. Men are just too aggressive to work in tech!

The aggression from testosterone leads men to be excessively competitive, which runs counter to team cohesion. It is distracting and undermines the ability of teams to collaborate and work together. Nobody cares who's the "best", Jim!

4. Men take part in several aggressively discriminatory practices to put themselves ahead of the natural owners of this field.

Men regularly network and put on all sorts of events, classes, and services to continue to steal this profession from us. They started this in the 70s and it's gotten worse and worse ever since. They even have the nerve to gaslight us, the rightful owners of this field, into thinking that they aren't usurpers! Get them out!

5. Men have distracting bodies!

You've all smelt men. The pungent odor is insufferable. What's worse, you might get it mixed with horrible cologne, a shallow attempt to mask this distracting odour and makes it even worse! How are we supposed to do our best work with these distractions walking around our offices?

accurate representation of the male brain An accurate representation of the male "brain"

If you couldn't get it through your hard hat, this is a parody website of what you lot say about us.